Beach Bag Lady

I’m at the beach, bikini is on. Looking around me I see beautiful women, confident in their skin. Suddenly I’m overwhelmed with grief. It doesn’t matter what I look like, how much effort I make with my appearance, I will always have the bag. A little girl walks past with her dad and stares at…

Getting stuck!

Not for the first time adhesions (or perhaps a twisted intestine) are making life a bit challenging. I’ve had an issue for most of the last week. My stoma is very swollen and pretty sore, lots of abdominal cramps and waves of escalating pain, nausea, bloating etc etc. It got to the point where I…

The illusion of happiness

‘Happiness is an illusion..’ So my Dad said the other day. That gave me something to ponder on. The pursuit of happiness is something I’ve spent a lot of time and energy on and made some big decisions based on my perception of happiness as I dare say have lots of other people. My pondering…

Snowy reflections 

I find myself in a hotel at the base of the Matterhorn just back from skiing and what a place to be. A year ago it wouldn’t have entered my head that this is where I might find myself today. I’ve skied in the past but not to any great extent so it’s been great…

Something’s happening…!

Something’s happening and I haven’t been able to explain it fully but I’m going to try here.. Life’s hard, a cliche that’s true and for various reasons along the way I’ve found it challenging. There was even a time when I was wishing it away, wanting to hurry up and get it over with. How…

Rowing my own boat

Rejection is a funny old thing and something I’ve become more resilient to. Surprisingly I’ve found rejection has an upside. It can be all too easy to focus on the negative when life knocks you down over and over but I’ve been trying to find the flip side. After all, I can’t change certain circumstances,…